How I Long for a Traditional Chinese Cousin-Marriage

As soon as she showed up I thought "Alright, here's best girl." Too devoted, too obsessive, and way too cute. Positive thoughts manifest as proclamations and negative ones as accusations. Just no middle ground with girls like this. She'll do anything for you except calmly listen to and consider what you have to say. The twin-tails with buns, jet-black hair, fiery orange eyes; the skills in cooking, acrobatics, and martial arts; the irresistible urge to be a clingy nuisance in public with no regard for how it might look to others; it all has the makings of an ancient Chinese herbal concoction that many might not want to engage with, but for those in the know, with studied palate and appreciation for nuance, it doesn't get better than this.