【 a b o u t m e 】
..stuff you need to know about me~
My real name's Sai. Frankly, I hate my real name so please call me Ryuk or Ryu. I'm 14 years old and I'm male (bisexual). I was born on January 23 and I live in India. I actually really hate where I live, because of many reasons except for one: food. I'm in 9th grade, at the moment. I love anime, of course. That's not the only thing I love, however: I also love soccer, ice cream, yaoi, music, cakes, scary stuff, glasses, quotes. I don't particularly hate anything .. maybe it's just that I can't remember stuff I don't like. I don't like being alone ... or so I say. The last part will be explained later on. I watch movies, other than anime. Normal comedies and horror ones. Not a big fan of action movies. I stay up at nights rather often to watch anime or browse MAL. I'm not picky with what I want to do or watch. Anything's fine. I'm not rude, really. If you want to talk to me, go ahead and do so. New friends are always welcome. I'd care for any true friend. If you want to talk to me, comment on my profile or pm me. The best option would be to add me on skype: sw0rdless69. I'm pretty much always online on there so it's better to chat there rather than mal.
So, let me explain the "I don't like being alone ... or so I say" part. It's actually kind of involves my love life so if you're not interested, don't even bother reading. But, but .. I feel like you'd understand me better if you did. I already stated that I'm bisexual but I'm kind of leaning more towards being gay. I like girls and guys too. But I only think of guys sexually so .. that might be why. Anyways, with that being said, I had or should I say "have..." crush on two guys in my class. One of them is was my bff. Well, both of them were, but I'd kind of hang out more with this guy. Oh, please note that I'll be referring to bff crush as A and other crush as B. So, A .. well, he was the first person I liked in those two guys. They didn't know I was bisexual and that I have a crush on them, until only recently like two months ago. I wasn't really desperate... wasn't. I kind of felt more attached to A and I was obsessed with him before I realized. Then .. after struggling for like a week, I told him that I'm bisexual and I have a crush on him. He was shocked and he didn't really reply anything. I did it after school and went to home. He didn't like .. reject me or something, though. I told him to keep it a secret and he did. Things went the same way they always used to, the next day and every next day. But one day, he kind of stopped talking to me. It wasn't like he was desperate to avoid me but he just .. didn't talk. I was depressed. I mean, of course I'd be. I waited for like four days and asked him what's up. We made up and it was ok again. But then again, he was far away. I don't know what happened but our friendship right now, is like so far away. That's when I finally realized that love is a really stupid thing. I was obsessed with love but now I am not. So yeah .. I kind of hate him now .. kind of. I mean, it's literally impossible to un-like someone once you like them.
This is before I was with love -- Another crush: I always liked him from the very beginning. But I wasn't desperate. After our exams ended, we went to a mall. Few of my friends and him. We had lots of fun there. A didn't come, however, because he had plans with family. Anyways, yeah, we had fun there. We went to scary house and we were holding hands. Guh, frankly, I took advantage of the situation lol. But honestly, it was damn fun. But before I knew it, I became desperate with him too. All I kept thinking was about him. I couldn't hold my feelings in anymore and so .. I told him I'm bisexual and I like him. Well, I was a big idiot and told him that over the phone >_>. But anyways, he understood me. He was shocked, as well. He didn't stop talking to me or something but things were a little bit awkward but they eventually became normal. But all of a sudden, he kind of stops talking to me too. I'm 101% sure it's not "avoid" .. well, not avoid exactly. It's like, the jerk totally forgot about me. Honestly, I hate people who do this. They know how I feel about them then why the fuck are they acting like that? So .. this was the actual moment I was done with love. Yup, I'm never gonna LOVE somebody again. I mean, I admit it, I still like him but .. not as much as I used to. Fucking fake friend. Don't even deserve to be called a friend.
So .. that was literally my love life .. yeah, I know it's pretty miserable but I'm really glad I am done with love right now. I'm more happy than I used to be. I'm avoiding these jerks and all my friends as well because they're fake. But I'm still happy.
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